can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
