If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize