You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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