my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
My vagina just clenched in fear
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
