That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Randomize
