wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
