Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize
