i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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