Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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