Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
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