Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
