Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
