What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
