He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
