she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize