Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
