At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
