I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Randomize
