you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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