Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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