I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
