I don't usually arrange sex via text message
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
