Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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