Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
