YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
