AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
