There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
