In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
