Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
