Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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