ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
