Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
