One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
