who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Randomize
