is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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