the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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