Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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