Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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