too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
