Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
