WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
