Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
