3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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