do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Damn victory sex feels great
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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