last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
