It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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