Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
