butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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