I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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