I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize